Big Sisters of BC Lower Mainland

Thank You for 50 Years & 50 Stories

2010-12-14T09:04:00.001-08:00

I was originally interested in working with this organization because I believed so strongly in its mission and in the power a positive relationship has on helping a young girl value herself. Having now had the privilege of working here for the past 11 years, I have had the pleasure of seeing that mission come to life, even more powerfully than I had ever imagined. I watch joyfully from the sidelines as our mentors truly transform the lives of our Little Sisters, and vice-versa. The life-changing friendships that are formed within the programs we offer make me proud to be a part of this amazing organization.

This has been a particularly proud year for Big Sisters of BC Lower Mainland, as we have celebrated our 50th Anniversary. It has been wonderful to have so many of you share your thoughts and experiences with us through this blog, including so many of our alumni participants. Your testimonials are a permanent record of what has been accomplished by this organization over the past 50 years, and give us perspective on what the work we are doing today achieves over the long term. Your stories reinforce for all of us that mentoring works, and that mentoring matters. Thank you for sharing your stories with us!

We could not have succeeded in reaching our 50th Anniversary without the incredible support of our community. My thanks to all of our amazing mentors, Little Sisters, parents, board members, donors, volunteers, and staff over the past 50 years for your incredible contribution to the strength of this organization. It is my great privilege to be in your company.

Written by Shannon Newman-Bennett, Executive Director

Miracles Do Happen

2010-12-07T09:00:00.000-08:00

My Little Sister is 18. Unbelievable. When we were matched, she was a silent nine year old. So much has happened since then. Marie’s mother died four months after we met. Her life since then has been shuttled between foster homes and her Dad’s home, full of a variety of relatives, siblings and houseguests. Her sister had a teenage pregnancy; that baby is now in foster care. Her brother is in jail.

Through it all, once every week or two, we have had a date. We have dinner, we see a movie, a play, I make cookies and she eats them… We have always laughed and we have always made plans for our next date.

Two years ago Marie* hugged me. I cannot tell you what that meant. Marie had such enormous emotional walls around her – but one day, after seven years, we were saying good bye and she gave me a hug. The enormity of that hug. Seven years was a long time to wait for that hug, but it was worth every minute. And that hug was just the beginning. She gets mad now. And she gets sad. And she can talk about what she is feeling. Sometimes what seems commonplace for one person is a miracle for another.

My Little Sister will graduate from high school. She will be the first person in her family to graduate from high school. And she is talking about post-secondary education. It has been a long hard journey for my Little Sister. But miracles do happen. I know. I’ve seen one.

Written by alumni Big Sister Susan*
*Note: names have been changed to protect confidentiality

Merina & Crystal

2010-11-30T09:29:00.000-08:00

Merina and I were matched as Study Buddies about a year and a half ago, and have had a lot of fun since. When we first met, she was hoping for some help with her times tables. It had been so long since I'd used math regularly, I barely remembered them myself! I thought I'd better prepare, and searched the web for the most effective ways to teach multiplication. What I didn't predict was that Merina completely understood the concepts - she was so smart – she just needed to memorize the equations and needed some help focusing. We played math card games for a few months, which didn't seem like tutoring at all but was amazingly effective. We made up our own games and our own rules (I never seemed to win).

After a long day at work, I look forward to seeing Merina and catching up on how she's doing at school. Seeing her makes me focus on the big picture – the things that are most important in life – and forget the small worries of my day.

I have learned at least as much from her as she has from me – she taught me about the colour wheel, I taught her how to spell antidisestablishmentarianism; I help her with math; she teaches me about cool music. Most recently, we've been working on English grammar and comprehension and she has taught me why it's important to never eat a hot chili pepper. We've taken our sessions out of the library as well – we went to UBC to learn about biodiversity, tried learning how to play tennis together (we still need a little practice), and have taken a first aid course. We have so much fun just hanging out - even more fun than I expected when I signed up as a volunteer.

Merina is doing better in school now, and I've learned how to put life in perspective. It's a joy to watch her learn, and I hear she likes my company too.

Written by Crystal, Study Buddy to Merina since March 2009; drawing by Little Sister Study Buddy Merina

Because of Big Sisters

2010-11-23T09:11:00.000-08:00

At our 2010 Big Sisters Gala, we celebrated our 50th anniversary with six special guests – six former Little Sisters were in attendance and shared one special thing that they have been able to accomplish in their lives because of their Big Sisters.

“Because of my Big Sister, Tracey, I realized how important a strong female figure is in a young person’s life, making me strive to be a better mom every day.” – Elissa, alumni Little Sister from 1999

"Because of my Big Sister I've grown up with the guidance of a mentor and the love of a best friend. She has helped me be the first in my family to achieve a college diploma and given me the motivation to continue on to achieve my degree!" – Heidi, alumni Little Sister from 2001

“Because of Big Sisters I have learned to appreciate the opportunity to affect the lives of the girls I work with. I strive each day to be a person they can look up to.” – Trish, alumni Little Sister from 1983

“Because of my Big Sister Janet I gained much needed stability in my life; stability that nurtured the trust and confidence that was necessary for me to grow and become the person I am today. I feel that Janet is one of the cornerstones of my foundation and without her I wouldn't be me." – Tia, alumni Little Sister from 1988

“Because of Big Sisters I met an amazing role model, and friend. She was the first person in my life who I felt was non judgmental and assisted me in making positive life choices.” – Carly, alumni Little Sister from 2001

"Because of my Big Sister I believe that I am of worth. My Big Sister Sue spent quality time with me and with that time I felt loved and important." – Josie, alumni Little Sister from 1985

Life-Long Friends; Life-Long Sisters

2010-11-16T09:24:00.000-08:00

It was in the fall of 1988 that my Little Sister Christina (Tia) and I were matched up. Our meeting was a last minute match up - Tia’s original Big Sister had an operation and could not make the scheduled appointment, so Big Sisters called and asked if I would be able to make the appointment. I replied, “Absolutely”.

During our first get together, I knew Tia and I would be a good match – we both liked colouring - and so we agreed to meet a week later. I rang the door bell and there was Tia all wide-eyed. “You came,” were the first words out of her mouth. I replied, “Of course I came, I said I would”. We jumped into my car to head out for dinner. I asked Tia, “Where would you like to go”? Tia replied, “Where would you like to go”? I said, “How about pizza? What pizza place do you want to go too”? Tia replied, “What place would you like to go?” I realized she either really did not want to make a decision or she did not want to disappoint me. I said “How about Boston Pizza or Pizza Hut”? Tia said, “Which one do you like?” I could see she was having a hard time making a choice so we decided we would go to Pizza Hut this time and Boston Pizza next time. Now, 22 years later, when we want to grab take out food, it is pizza and a Pepsi for us. It’s our thing.

Thanks to Big Sisters we went to a lot of their events the first year we were together. We also went to movies, painted Christmas scenes on my parents’ living room window, baked, made cards and enjoyed walks together. I taught Tia to wet the back of a wooden spoon to flatten rice crispy squares and she taught me how to call squirrels in Stanley Park by tapping two walnuts together. I supported Tia by going to see her modeling/acting school final show and I saw her became Honoured Queen with Job’s Daughters.

For a few years we did not see each other, however I kept leaving messages for her to let her know I was here for her (we did not have cell phones back then!). One day we finally connected and met at a pub. I could not believe my Little Sister was of age and we could have a drink together if we choose to do so. We caught up on our lives - I was married and she had a new boyfriend named Jordan.

In November 1999 I injured my left hand. Tia wrapped my Christmas presents for me, helped me cut down a tree and decorated it. In our adult years we shared a lot from my injury that became a permanent disability: my divorce, selling a house, and staring a job all in one year; my mom passing away; Tia moving to Vernon, becoming pregnant and now being a mom.

I never thought a 12 year old little girl would become a life-long friend. We meet by chance through Big Sisters but became sisters by choice. I am so proud to call Tia my Little Sister.

Written by Janet McFarlane, alumni Big Sister

Being a Big Sister

2010-11-09T09:06:00.000-08:00

I will never forget the day I met my Little Sister Ashley for the first time. I was SO excited and nervous. I could tell she was as well. I was 26. We connected instantly and I felt a bond that I will always feel with Ashley.

We began our journey with many fun adventures: movies, theatre, boating trips, hockey games or even just hanging out and people watching. Ashley was an incredible 13 year old when I met her. Mature far beyond her years, she always (and still does) amazed me with her grown up attitude and thoughts. She is absolutely one of the most beautiful souls that I have ever met. She is a free spirit who treats everyone with respect. She is open-minded and smart. I love her and I am so proud of the woman she has become. She is working towards goals that I have utmost faith she will attain.

Being a Big Sister is something that I am truly proud of. I enjoyed it immensely and am just so grateful to have been able to be a small part of Ashley’s teenager years and to carry on after Big Sisters as her friend. It was great to watch her grow and hear her stories and to be there through some of her ups and downs. One thing I never did with Ashley was judge her. I would never tell her what she did was wrong. If it was, she already knew. I wasn’t in her life to teach her right from wrong -- I was in her life as a mentor. Someone she could trust. Someone she could come to with any problems or issues in her life and I would listen with an open mind and never criticize. It was a beautiful foundation for a lifelong friendship that I will cherish always.

Written by Krista, alumni Big Sister (2001-2007)

My Experience as a Go Girls! Healthy Bodies, Healthy Minds Mentor

2010-11-02T09:39:00.000-07:00

I had always wanted to volunteer with Big Sisters and I finally got the opportunity when I heard about the Go Girls! Healthy Bodies, Healthy Minds program while attending SFU in 2009. I was instantly drawn to the program as I read more about it, especially since the program would allow me to work with adolescent girls who were experiencing issues that I could relate to. I fully supported the programs goals of balanced eating, maintaining an active lifestyle, enhancing self-esteem, and most importantly – to have fun!

The Go Girls! program coordinator, Carolyn Fernie, has provided me with the tools and motivation needed to be a successful facilitator and role model for the young girls that I have worked with. The training session that each mentor participates in helps to ease any anxiety about being a facilitator.

During my months as a mentor, I learned to be patient with the girls as some needed to be motivated to participate. I enjoyed the challenge of moulding the sessions to best fit the needs of the individuals that I worked with. There is definitely no “one size fits all” model of running the sessions as the group dynamics can vary greatly. Although it can be frustrating and challenging at times, it is definitely a very rewarding experience to see how much the girls excel during our time together. Even with the toughest groups, it is amazing how much respect, trust and understanding can be established amongst the girls during the eight weeks of the program.

Overall, knowing that my time has enlightened the lives of young girls in even a subtle way makes me feel that I have made a difference in their lives. Many of the girls in this program come from various backgrounds and family situations and this diversity adds challenges as well as an opportunity to build friendships, sympathy, and understanding. I think the support provided by a Go Girls! mentor helps these young girls cope with difficulties they may be experiencing and provides a confidential environment in which they can talk about these issues.

Thank you, Big Sisters, for giving me such a wonderful opportunity!

Written by Kam Johal, Go Girls! Healthy Bodies, Healthy Minds mentor

Two Special Mentors

2010-10-26T09:36:00.000-07:00

I was 12 years old when I first got matched with my Big Sister Glenda. I was so nervous at first because I didn’t want someone my parents’ age -- I wanted someone who knew about the world and could help guide me through it. Once I started hanging out with Glenda I realized that she was fun and had a great sense of humor. We quickly figured out that we are both Leos and Year of the Horse so we knew it was a match made in heaven. Glenda saw that I had difficulties in reading and writing and suggested I get a Study Buddy tutor through Big Sisters. So a few months later I got matched with Dana. I was worried that she was going to be like my teachers and it would just be more school work after school was done, but Dana was very caring and took as much time as I needed with my homework and made up fun activities to teach me how to sound out words and how to spell them.

Growing up it was just my dad, my sister Marina, who is developmentally delayed, and me. It was hard to talk to Marina about things happening in my life because she just didn’t understand. My dad met a woman who he thought was good for us, but in the end they just fought and I fell further. I finally made the choice to leave and move in with my aunt and uncle. I was in grade 10 at the time and moved from North Vancouver to New Westminster. It was hard but I wanted to finish my schooling in North Vancouver and Glenda and Dana supported my decision and were there for me whenever I need someone to talk to. I am proud to say I graduated from high school because of them.

I am so gratefully for being able to have both a Big Sister and Study Buddy. They have both helped me out in very different areas of my life and have made me the confident woman I am today. I would like to thank Glenda and Dana for always being there for me and for continuing to be there for me and I would like to thank Big Sisters for matching me with two amazing women.

Written by Marley, alumni Little Sister from 2002

PHOTO: Dana, Marley, and Glenda at the 2008 Big Sisters Gala

Martina & Masha's Video Blog

2010-10-19T09:16:00.000-07:00

A Big Sister's Luck

2010-10-12T08:49:00.001-07:00

Everyone talks about how lucky my Little Sister is. How lucky she is to have me in her life, how she would never have graduated high school without my support, the opportunities she has had with me: attending plays and musicals, eating out, learning to cook and bake, weekends away …those are the things everyone sees.

No one really sees the impact on ME of having a Little Sister. Here are the things I would never have experienced without my Little Sister. I would never have understood how many different headbands are available and just how many one person requires. I would not have seen every princess movie released in the last few years (about 11 by my count!). My taste in music has expanded widely – my little loves Ke$ha and Eminem as well as Michael Buble (so cute!). I can discuss Glee and Gossip Girls and any Robert Pattinson news. She keeps me younger and au courant.

I now have a First Nations family. I have learned so much about another culture. My Little’s stepmother and step-grandmother and seven year old half-sister are part of my family and I am part of theirs. We all pitch in when there is trouble and celebrate together when things are good. My life and community is so much broader.

Did I mention how much she makes me laugh? Did I mention how much I cried at her graduation when she thanked me from the stage?

I know everyone thinks my Little Sister is so lucky. But I am so lucky too.

Written by Dawn Brennan, Big Sister from 1996-2009

A Mother’s and Daughter’s Thanks

2010-10-05T09:09:00.000-07:00

My name is Aziza and I'm proud to be part of the Study Buddy program! I can't tell you how much my tutor has helped me improve in my needed subjects. I want to thank the Study Buddy program for all it's done for me. I have had two Study Buddies in the past 4 years because the first one couldn't teach me anymore. She left me with a lot of knowledge in science, socials and reading. After her, I got paired up with the most amazing tutor in English. She has helped me boost up my grades by one or more grade levels! I couldn't have done it with out her! The Study Buddy program is an amazing and awesome way to get a little help in subjects others might find challenging.

So congratz Big Sisters on celebrating 50 years of amazingness! Hope many more years will come!

Sincerely,
♥ Aziza, age 13, Little Sister Study Buddy since 2007

My name is Susana Rustemova and I'm Aziza's mother. I would like to thank the Big Sisters program for giving my daughter confidence at school. When we came to Canada, we didn't speak English and the Big Sisters program helped her find the confidence to make close friends and helped her in studies she may have not understood. I do not regret one thing about putting her in this great program. I encourage other parents to let their children go through the Study Buddy program. They use the Little Sister's personality and match it with the Study Buddy. That way they have a lot in common, study hard, and have fun at it!

Thank you so much, Big Sisters! Congratulations on your 50 years! May many more wonderful years come!

With Love,
Susan Rustemova, Aziza’s mother and an Uzbekistan immigrant

Small Gestures, Big Impact

2010-09-27T15:21:00.000-07:00

I think I was around age 11 when I got referred to Big Sisters – it was in the mid-1980s. My mom referred me to Big Sisters because she was a single mom with six kids – all girls – and she worked full-time so she was rarely home and, when she was home, she was really tired.

The first time I met my Big Sister Sue I saw that she was friendly and I got the feeling that she was a really nice person. At that time in my life, because my mom was so busy, I didn’t really have any other role models around me. I had two older sisters but they had already left the house and one became a parent herself and the other one was into drinking and wasn’t able to be there for me as a role model. So when Sue came into my life, it was a key time for me.

Sue spent quality time with me and our time together had a big impact on my life. We used to do simple things like taking her dogs for a walk and in the summer we would garden together – I had never had anyone to show me how to garden before. We used to do baking and biking and all of these activities that I had never done with my mom or with anyone else. I was a very shy girl and I was awkward in social situations but, by spending time with Sue, I became more confident in social situations and I made more friends. I remember we went to the Big Sisters Camp – we met lots of people there and we went canoeing -- I had never done that before.

The friendship that I had with Sue was so important because I grew up in a very dysfunctional home – my upbringing was not very safe or healthy. Sue heard about my family situations but she never judged me, she just listened. Sue gave me so much care and concern and it was wonderful because I had never had a positive relationship with a female in my life like that before. A lot of the females in my life were into drinking and my mom was too busy so I didn’t really have anyone in my life then. It was so nice to have that one-to-one time with Sue. When I would go to Sue’s house she used to make me macaroni and cheese – every time I asked her to make it she’d say yes. She’d make me blueberry muffins too. It was simple things like that. Sue really made me feel special, cared for and loved.

When I got to my teenage years I rebelled really bad and got into drinking and into trouble with friends. Whenever I called Sue during that time she was sad and worried about me, but she said she just wanted me to take care of myself. All of Sue’s love and care was one of the reasons why I eventually decided I shouldn’t be doing all that. Her friendship was very healing for me. Sue didn’t counsel me, she just spent time with me. It was wonderful. I directly contribute where I am in my life today to Sue. Her friendship and caring and the quality time she spent with me went a long way.

In 2004 when I referred my daughter Tianna to Big Sisters, I was a single mom and going to school so she needed to spend time with another positive role model. Tianna’s been through some trauma, which has affected her in many ways, so having a Big Sister to talk to was really good for her. I think it has had a positive impact on Tianna’s life. She’s a lot happier and more confident as a result of spending time with her Big Sister. As her mom, I’m very happy she’s had Big Sisters because they’ve all had a very positive impact on her.

My Big Sister Sue and I are still in touch today even though she lives in Saskatchewan now. We talk every now and then and I send her pictures. Whenever I talk to her I always tell her how grateful I am for her. She’s wonderful – there isn’t enough that I can say about Sue. The time she spent with me has affected my life and how I am with my kids today. I do the small things for my kids now like making them macaroni and cheese like Sue used to make for me and making sure they’re comfortable and happy – that same care that Sue gave me and that I didn’t have at home when I was young. I still have my past issues and things that I witnessed as a child that I am working through, but I believe that who I am today – the kind of mom I am and the kind of person that I’ve turned out to be – is because of Sue. Being a First Nations woman, my life could have been very different. I’ve seen my other friends – friends from the same background but friends who didn’t have a Big Sister – end up on skid row, or lose their way, or die from alcoholism. That could have easily been me but, because Sue gave me so much love, I was able to love myself back. She was one of the reasons that I bettered my life.
As told to Lisa Cloutier by Josephine (former Little Sister and mom of current Little Sister Tianna)

My Experience with Big Sisters

2010-09-21T08:50:00.000-07:00

Being a Little Sister has been one of the powerful and influential experiences of my life. My Big Sister Krista and I were matched up when I was 13, shortly after my older sister moved away from home. As soon as I met Krista I knew that she was a very special person. I was a very shy kid, but she was so kind and I felt comfortable talking to her. The connection for me was immediate. I look back on our first meeting and I see it as one of the most fortunate days of my life -- I now believe in perfect matches!

Throughout our years with Big Sisters, Krista and I had so many exciting experiences. From going to watch the Vancouver Symphony Orchestra and Romeo and Juliet live, to screaming our heads off at hockey games and concerts. But the most memorable moments for me have been simply hanging out at the beach or sitting on her couch watching movies.

Nine long years have gone by and I’m so happy I can say I have a friend in Krista. She has guided me and offered me advice when I was lost. She has been a huge part of my development into the person I am today, and I feel so lucky to have her in my life. We’ve laughed together, cried together, shared experiences, and all out had an awesome time! I LOVE YOU GIRL!!

Written by Ashley, alumni Little Sister (2001-2007)

A True Sister…for 32 Years

2010-09-14T09:50:00.000-07:00

My name is Peggy Rakkar. I am a former Little Sister who was matched with my Big Sister when I was 8 years old and I am still in contact with her today (I am now 41 years old). We call each other sisters and my boys call her Aunty. She was at the birth of two of my boys who are now 22, 20 and 17. I would just like to say she is the best thing that ever happened to me. My childhood was not a good one until she came into my life. My mother was very abusive to me both verbally and physically. My Big Sister made me look at myself and know that it was a problem my mother had and not me. This is just a little glimpse of what we have gone through: her divorce, the death of her first son, and the health of her adopted son; the loss of both my mother and father plus little brother; and family problems with my oldest son and husband. My Big Sister also helped me when I went to school to take my care aide course. She is an RN and I wanted to do something similar to what she has done with her career. I have now been in the healthcare field for 12 years. I believe my life would have been much different if I did not have my Big Sister in my life.

I really believe that Big Sisters made it possible for me to not only have a life, but also a true sister. My Big Sister gave me the confidence to live my life and to accept myself and to know that I was not useless as I was told daily. Thank you to Big Sisters for my Big Sister.

Written by Peggy Rakkar, Little Sister from 1978

Stories from a Study Buddy Match

2010-09-07T09:10:00.000-07:00

Ayelet’s Story - An Energetic Tutee’s Experience

The first time I met my Study Buddy, Kelsey, at the Big Sisters House was a great experience because it gave me a chance to meet her before we started working together. When I first saw her I had a really good feeling about how studying with Kelsey was going to work out. Now, I feel even better, since I have gotten to know Kelsey more. She is both funny and strict, but most of the time she is really funny and really fun to be with.

Kelsey is always encouraging. She tells me that if I try I will succeed in what I do. She often says to me, “Think harder, Ayelet, and then you’ll get the right answer.”

Kelsey even makes studying fun! One of the times that Kelsey and I studied together we were working on science and my teacher wanted me to study the parts of the microscope. This seemed like a boring task, but Kelsey made studying into a fun game by giving me a few minutes to study the parts and then covering up the labels and having me label the parts from my memory.

Kelsey’s Story – A Proud Tutor’s Perspective

When I was first introduced to Ayelet I was apprehensive about how she would react to me. I was unsure about how to act around her, but I figured the best thing I could do was to be accepting, bright-eyed, and ready to learn. This must have worked since we have gotten along well since our first meeting.

My tutoring sessions with Ayelet are very diverse, but we always seem to have a good time. Even when both of us are tired, we work well together. I have found that bringing work for Ayelet that is slightly above her comfort zone and grade level helps boost her confidence and her drive to succeed. Ayelet is always willing to work harder in order to overcome a new and challenging task.

I could not ask for a better Little Sister Study Buddy than Ayelet. She has become more open to me emotionally in the past year and I believe that she trusts me. This has made our study sessions both enjoyable and successful. I hope to help her through the tough world of high school and be present to witness her success when she graduates.

Written by Study Buddies Kelsey & Ayelet, matched since January 2009

Being a Friend

2010-08-31T09:14:00.000-07:00

What does it take to be a friend – a role model – to a child? Interestingly, it doesn't take any special skill set to make an enormous, positive difference in the life of a child. In fact, research suggests that it is simply being a friend, as opposed to purposely trying to guide, steer, coach, teach or direct a youth, that is most important in a mentoring relationship. As a Big Sister I often found this difficult to remember. I would worry about the fact that my Little Sister's friends were trying drugs or that her grades were too low and I would feel an incredibly strong impulse to parent. Thankfully, I was generally able to reign myself in and concentrate on having fun and supporting her through my friendship instead of providing unsolicited advice.

In writing my dissertation on predicting success in mentoring matches, I had the opportunity to review much research on the topic of mentoring and what it takes to have a successful mentoring relationship. The literature suggests that the things that really make a difference in mentoring are: hanging in there (relationships that last over a year are proven to be the most effective), listening, being available, developing a close bond, and having fun... interestingly, the very same things that tend to positively impact all our relationships.

So don't worry if you don't know the right answer to your Little's question - the truly important thing is that she feels comfortable enough to ask it!

Written by Jocelyn, alumni Big Sister and board member, and researcher

A Proud Big Sister

2010-08-24T08:30:00.000-07:00

I’ve been a Big Sister since the 1970s. Over four decades! It is wonderful to see how my Little Sister, Ana, grew into a self-confident, positive woman. It’s been an adventure. From a seven-year-old girl with no front teeth, playing with ‘My Little Pony’, to a very lively, outgoing and outspoken teenager, to a young woman graduating from university, to the pride I felt when Ana kept her dignity and steadfastness when her mother was dying of ALS, to a bride, and watching her as she became a mother.

I know that much of Ana’s strength lies in the support she received along the way. From her family, my love and support, and from us following the basic philosophy of the Big Sisters organization: to enhance the confidence, self-esteem and well-being of girls through supportive friendships with caring women. I’m very proud to be a Big Sister, and the most important thing Ana taught me is that every obstacle does have some sort of opportunity … IF you approach it like Ana has - with humor, a positive attitude and dignity. She has had a lot of tough times and heartache. She takes the bumps along the road of life in stride, just as she does the smooth spots. Ana Tajuelo makes me very proud, and I love her more for the woman she has become.

Big Sisters is integral to the structure of our society. Times are tough, people have great needs, especially young girls, and if there is an opportunity to have a friend and an organization like Big Sisters whose sole purpose is to offer supportive friendships. Big Sisters is a life-changing opportunity. For the Little Sisters, and the women who become their Big Sisters. Just ask Ana or me.

Written by Margo Bates, alumni Big Sister since the 1970s

32 Years of Sisterhood

2010-08-17T09:25:00.000-07:00

My name is Pauline Barratt. I joined Big Sisters in 1971 when the office was still in the old YWCA on Burrard Street. Before I met Peggy I had several Little Sisters who I thoroughly enjoyed being with, however, for various and differing reasons, each of these relationships finally ended.

In March of 1978 I was matched with Peggy as my new Little Sister. Little did I know that, 32 years later, we would still be in contact. In fact, it is much more than contact – we are truly sisters and friends. I always wanted a sister and love having Peggy in my life. I have watched her boys grow and mature into young men. In fact, I was the very first person, other than medical staff, to see Peggy's youngest son after he was born. What a thrill and a privilege that was.

Peggy had more than her share of difficulties and challenges in her childhood and over the years. I also have had major life challenges. Through it all – family troubles, deaths of loved ones, raising children, ill health, and other life problems – we have been there for each other. And it has always been a gift for me to have a sister in my life. As an immigrant to Canada (from Australia in 1969) the only family I have here is my second son and, as much as I love him, he isn't into doing 'girl stuff' with his mom.

Peggy and I have shared common interests such as going out for walks, going to the movies and working in health care. There are great memories of going to Big Sisters parties and weekend camps. Peggy was in one of my groups when I presented the “Growing Up Female” program many years ago.

Peggy often reminds me about the influence I have had on her life. However, I often think she sells herself short. I have great admiration for her courage and ability to forge through the troubles she has experienced and yet still maintain a caring for people, an ability to be a good friend, and a strong work ethic. Peggy always had concern about her ability to learn – but she is smarter than she believes. She passed her resident care aide course successfully and I'm always in awe of her ability to speak fluent Punjabi, which she learned as an adult when she married into a Sikh family. I can't even read the French label on a can of food.

I am proud to share a sisterhood with her. Peggy is my sister in every way that counts, and I wouldn't have it any other way.

Written by Pauline Barratt, alumni Big Sister since 1971

Hidden Treasures of Go Girls! Healthy Bodies, Healthy Minds

2010-08-10T10:39:00.000-07:00

As the program coordinator for Big Sisters’ Go Girls! Healthy Bodies, Healthy Minds program I have the honour of meeting the participating girls, ages 11-14, for the first two hour session and then for the last session, eight weeks later.

What I love about these visits to the schools is witnessing the amazing positive changes that occur for the girls over the course of the two month Go Girls! program. Go Girls! Healthy Bodies, Healthy Minds sets out to encourage active living, balanced eating and feeling good about oneself, but often there is so much more that happens for these girls within this group mentoring program. For the participants, the first session is often met with feelings of uncertainty, awkwardness and anxiety as they are invited to participate in a group with peers they may not know. During these first sessions, I have met with girls who have difficulty making eye contact, girls that opt out of all of the interactive group activities, and girls that seem withdrawn and self-conscious about their participation in the program.

When I arrive for the eighth session, I am pleasantly surprised by the incredible differences in the girls’ interactions. The uncomfortable quiet of the first day is forgotten as I enter a room that is abuzz with laughter, chatter, excitement and girls exchanging phone numbers. Just recently, I had the pleasure of witnessing a simple, yet powerful interaction between two girls. One of the girls was described as socially isolated, especially in the school environment where she spent lunch time alone. During the last Go Girls! session, this same girl received a heart-felt hug from one of her peers in the program who then said “we should get together sometime”. Both girls were beaming from ear to ear and the message was simple – I am happy, I have made a friend. It is this development of new, positive peer relationships and social connectedness within the school environment that can be life-altering for these girls. These are what I refer to as the “hidden treasures” of the Go Girls! Healthy Bodies, Healthy Minds program.

For more information on Go Girls! Healthy Bodies, Healthy Minds, please contact me at 604-873-4525 ext. 311 or cfernie@bigsisters.bc.ca.

Carolyn Fernie, Big Sisters employee since 2003

Emily's Story

2010-08-03T09:44:00.000-07:00

My name is Emily. I joined the Study Buddy program two years ago. I got involved in this program because of my teacher. She recommended the Study Buddy program to me and I liked it very much.

This program helps me with my school work. My Study Buddy, Penny, helped me a lot with my science when I was in Science 10. She helps me with my chemistry and other subjects too.

I didn’t like to talk to people and I remember the first time I saw Penny, I was very shy. I didn’t know what I could talk to her about and I didn’t like talking either. But now, I am totally different. I am not shy any more. I became very talkative and enjoy speaking in front of people. Another big difference is my English improved a lot, mainly because of Penny’s help.

I learned a lot of valuable things from Penny. She taught me how helping other people can make them feel extremely welcomed and how to try my best to do things and don’t give up. She told me to set goals for little things in order to get a big success. Penny is very busy but she would like to make an appointment with my teacher to talk about my future career. I am so impressed by her that she thinks and worries about my career and my chemistry.

Many times I have told myself how lucky I am to have a chance to be Penny’s Little Sister, and how lucky I am to get involved in this Study Buddy program. From the depth of my heart, I want to say “Thank you so much, Penny. Thank you for all your help and hard work. And thank you, Study Buddy program, for having me involved”.

Emily, age 16, Little Sister Study Buddy since 2008 (Emily immigrated from China with her family in 2008)

A Letter from a Little Sister

2010-07-27T10:43:00.000-07:00

Dear Big Sisters and Readers,

My name is Shupri. I am 13 years old. I am in grade 7 and I’ve been matched up with my Big Sister Christina since June 2009. It has been one the greatest things that have ever happened to me because this has been an experience that has changed my life in the best way.

My life before Christina was ideal but not perfect – and no one’s life is perfect but I felt that I had more flaws inside myself than most people. I was feeling very sad and wasn’t able to laugh it off like others can. So when I heard about Big Sisters, I didn’t know how to feel – no one I knew was involved with them. I was nervous. I wrote in my application that I wanted someone who had been bullied or who had felt as alone as I felt when they were in elementary school (or high school). That’s when I was matched up with Christina. She is one of the kindness people you will meet in all your life. When I met her for the first time, I knew this would be the most exciting thing ever. And her smile just slapped me in the heart because it was so welcoming even though we were both super nervous. She is truly changing my life for the better.

Now what do Big and Little Sisters do together? It’s different for different matches but, for us, we like to do more down-to-earth things like play board games on a rainy day, rent a movie, take a walk down Main Street, etc. But then we do the things everyone just wishes they could do like watch a Canucks game… in the BOX. O yeah! And watch a BC Lion’s football game, and so much more. Christina also helps me with schools projects like when my class had to get into groups and lip-sync and dance to the song of your choice. I asked Christina if she could help me and she did more than just help me – she got a friend who is a movie producer and we made it a mini grade 7 student’s MUSIC VIDEO! It is so cool and it’s also on YouTube so you could search it if you want – I’m not kidding! Big Sisters don’t do your homework, but they encourage their Little Sisters, like me, to rock out in front of a video camera and feel like a superstar anytime. Christina truly helps me believe that I can be whatever I want, no matter how crazy and/or insane it may be.

I think Big Sisters are helping girls like me feel that life can be even a little bit better with someone who can relate to you in ways your families can’t, because they’re your family. So I still talk and chat with my mom about my problems and issues, but Christina is there so I have a friend to talk to about becoming the best woman I can be in more of a friend way. And I hope we will be matched forever.

Little Sister Shupri, age 13 (pictured at right with her Big Sister Christina)

How My Little Sister Impacted My Life

2010-07-20T09:49:00.000-07:00

One of the things I never anticipated was how my Little Sister might impact my life and encourage me to do things that I never would have considered before. To be honest, when I started the process of becoming a Big Sister way back in 1996, I thought that I would be giving everything to my Little Sister -instead it was her who taught me things about myself. At that time, I was a youthful 22 years old and embarking on my career as a social worker. I remember cramming into a packed house with a room full of volunteers sharing our reasons about why we wanted to become Big Sisters.

Kirsten and I were matched in 1997 and I remember arriving at her house only to find out that her mother had forgotten our appointment. Kirsten was playing at Oppenheimer Park (at that time she was 8) and I didn’t think anything of it. Thankfully my counsellor at the time persevered and we found her sitting on the swing all by herself. It was one of those moments I will never forget.

Kirsten taught me what it meant to be open, honest and how important it was to communicate what you felt. She taught me that it doesn’t pay to get stressed out about the small things and that life can be as simple as you make it. One rainy afternoon we enjoyed doing nothing and just rode the bus until our transfers expired. We would spend our time baking and she never once complained that nothing ever turned out. She taught me that it was worth it not to give up as sometimes I would show up at her house only to find out that the family had other plans. But the next week they were there and we would carry on. We had sleepovers, skating lessons, and she came for family dinners. Her family came to my wedding and she introduced herself to all of my family as my Little Sister, convincing many that she truly was. She taught me that there is nothing to fear about difference and that all people are people underneath. She taught me about the value of family and their significance in our lives regardless of what history they may have.

Today, I have two young children of my own and, after a foray into Ministry child protection, I have returned to work with Big Sisters. Kirsten told me just a year ago after our on again, off again 12 year relationship, that there were two things that saved her and I was one of them.

Now, as I work with all the wonderful volunteers and families at Big Sisters, I can’t help think of Kirst every time I put a match together and wonder what their story will be in 10 years!

Thanks Kirst!

Written by Tiffany Britton, alumni Big Sister and current Big Sisters staff member

Two Generations of Littles

2010-07-13T11:04:00.000-07:00

Hi, my name is Shannon and I was once a Little Sister way back in the 1980's. I will say that my time and friendship with my Big Sister came at a good time in my life because I was able to spend one-on-one time with someone who always seemed interested in what I had to say. It felt good knowing that my Big Sister cared about me and enjoyed her time with me as well.

Over the years I have thought from time to time about my Big Sister and wondered how her life was for her and hoped she was well, so I guess you could say my Big Sister stayed in my heart even twenty five years later.

Today I am trying to get my eleven year old daughter a Study Buddy tutor through Big Sisters. I feel good knowing that she will have a positive and long-lasting impression as I did with my caring Big Sister.

Written by Shannon, former Little Sister and mom to a future Little Sister Study Buddy

Lessons from the First Year of High School

2010-07-06T11:00:00.000-07:00

Tianna’s Perspective (Little Sister Study Buddy)
Overall, my first year of high school was a great year. I went to a new school where I had different classes with different teachers. Some of the things I really liked about high school, some of them I didn’t. I had fun at my first dance, organized my first locker, and struggled with the teaching methods of one teacher. Although we did not always see eye to eye, I did learn a lesson from this teacher - In life, you are not always going to like everyone but with a little perseverance it is still possible to be successful. With determination, lots of frustration, and even more hard work, I got through Science class. Next year I will keep working hard and I will be successful once again. Bring on Grade 9 – although I am looking forward to a fun summer first!

Meghan’s Perspective (Study Buddy tutor)
Tianna’s first year of high school brought some new challenges for me – challenges I never expected. Due to an impersonal teaching style, a struggle resulted with one of Tianna’s teachers this year. It was incredibly difficult for me to watch Tianna struggle in one class while working harder than ever, and doing outstanding in all of her other classes. She demonstrated a maturity beyond her years as she did everything she could to make the best of a challenging situation. She reached out to her family, her counsellors as well as principal, and even me. Unfortunately all our hands were tied, as sometimes they are in life. We had to decide to make the best of this situation and keep working hard. This reminded me that sometimes in life, you are not going to get along with everyone, and not everyone is going to like you, but if you work hard, and maintain your integrity, you can make the best of difficult situations.

Written by Meghan & Tianna, Study Buddies since 2005

Camps, Rice Krispies and a Canuck – A Little’s Memories

2010-06-29T08:49:00.000-07:00

I have so many stories from when I had my Big Sisters, Christine and Arlene. I was first matched with Christine (pictured with Jamie at left) for just over a year in 1994 and then we lost touch, but the memories that we have together are going to Big Sister events such as the 5k walk and the annual Christmas party at a really nice restaurant. I was then matched with Arlene, and we were matched for a few years. We went to camp every year, and to the Christmas parties, among other things. One year, Big Sisters and Big Brothers had a sailing day were the two groups headed over to Bowen Island from Granville Island by boat. There was a special guest and it was Pavel Bure and of course I enjoyed meeting him as he was one of my fav hockey players when he played for the Canucks. Arlene and I also headed up to Camp Howdy two years in a row for the Big Sisters Camp, which was awesome. One year I celebrated my 13th birthday up there and Arlene brought Rice Krispies for everyone. Then one year I almost ended up in the hospital because I slipped on a rock and Arlene stayed with me that night because I had a headache. There are so many different stories I have of all the memories that I have with Big Sisters.

It’s been 10 years since I last saw Arlene. I last saw her on my sweet 16th birthday in Richmond at the Cactus Club. She had to go to the Netherlands to work on the Air India case so it’s now been 10 years since we were matched. I still remember the good times we had. Miss ya Arlene!

Written by Jamie Lavoie, Alumni Little Sister (1994-2000)

12 Years and Counting

2010-06-22T08:41:00.000-07:00

My Big Sister Denise and I met in 1998 when I was 9 years old. My experience of having a Big Sister through Big Sisters of BC Lower Mainland has been fantastic – it has been a wonderful12 years that I have spent with Denise! We’ve gone to camps on the weekends, which were truly amazing times. I have a lot of memories built up and friendships with Denise and other Big and Little Sisters through this program. Through camping trips and other events we met many other Big and Little Sisters – it has been a blessing getting to know them and we are still friends with some of them to this day. It has been an exciting journey throughout the last 12 years, and I hope some day I will become a Big Sister so that I can create many new memories and experience all this fun with the next generation of Little Sisters. Denise and I both have agreed that we are gonna be sisters for life!

Amanda Pollon, alumni Little Sister (1998-2008)

A Mother's Story

2010-06-15T09:00:00.000-07:00

I would like to share with people the incredible difference Big Sisters has had in our family. My eldest of three girls had been having a very difficult year at school having been bullied by her classmates and over the year had gone from a funny, bright, outgoing young girl to one that was tearful, sad and quiet, where listening to music locked up in her room was how she coped with her feelings. Her behaviour had escalated at home where she was unpleasant to be around and it was clear that she was in crisis. When asked about what would make the situation better, she would talk about having a friend. Someone she could talk to and feel good about. With school not being a source of friends for Shupri, a friend of mine suggested Big Sisters as a way to bring a positive role model into her life.

In June, 2009, Shupri was matched with her big sister Christina. It took a bit of time for them to get to know each other, but now, 10 months later, they are great friends. Christina is the ideal role model for a teen girl. She’s educated, employed, and hip. She had similar experiences in elementary school and is able to listen and support Shupri when she is struggling. They have lots of fun together. They see each other about four hours a week and the Big Sisters program offers outings and events that they enjoy taking part in. So far they have seen a hockey game, gone to a roller derby, shopped for new purses, worked on school projects together, and their favorite activity together is cooking.

This year, after changing schools and having to fit into a new school, the emotions have been high, but Shupri has conquered the issues and has maintained her self esteem. I believe that Christina has played a really big role in this, as she has been able to support Shupri in a way only a friend or Big Sister can.

Thank you Big Sisters and Christina!

Written by Cat, mom of Little Sister Shupri

1979 Memories

2010-06-08T09:11:00.000-07:00

My mother worked for Big Sisters in Vancouver when I was a little girl, this was the late 1970’s. Her job responsibilities involved meeting potential girls and women, screening them and making matches. For the first year of her job, my sister and I hung around the office, little office rats, stealing sugar cubes from the coffee and tea area and jealously looking at the Bigs and Littles as they were matched, and hanging out at the periphery of parties and events. Does anyone else remember that Main Street office?

Finally, after months of begging, my mother relented and matched me with Georgie Hendry and my sister with Linda Proudfoot, we were 8 and 11 at the time.

The next year and a half with Georgie were glorious. She was so much fun and very exciting. She drove a big Jeep with huge wheels and we tore around Vancouver with the top down and the wind whistling in our ears. She introduced me to music and bought me my first record, Kate Bush – we learned all the words to “Babooshka” and sang them while dancing around her tiny apartment. Georgie loved taking pictures and had a darkroom (well, it was really her bathroom), we went into the park and took pictures of each other and developed them in the dark room – I can still smell the chemicals.

That year (1979-1980) was a great year for parties. The Big Sisters Halloween party was fantastic. Georgie dressed up as a biker and I dressed up as Wonder Woman, we took first prize even though we both had the flu. The Big Sisters Christmas party was held out at UBC in a grand old mansion. Santa gave me a Hershey Bar and, to this day, I love a Hershey chocolate bar. We opened Christmas gifts under a huge Christmas tree to the roar of a bonfire. The next summer we went to Evans Lake to camp for the weekend – we learned about the ghosts of the campers under the rock slide and canoed and went on treasure hunts. Georgie and I put on a play and greatly amused ourselves, and, I hope, others.

After that amazing year we left Vancouver, Big Sisters, and my beloved Georgie behind. I never heard from her again, despite numerous attempts to find her. The memories of that year and the great compassion and fun left a huge legacy for me in my adult life. As a mother now to my own children, I try to find fun and adventure in the mundane. As a professional social worker working in adoptions, I now match families and children in the same way my mother once matched Bigs and Littles. I have a strong belief in justice, equality and advocacy.

Research into resilience – the power to overcome huge life obstacles – proves that having one single non-related person who cares for you and believes in you is the most significant factor for success in life, despite great adversity. Isn’t that interesting? Isn’t that exactly what Big Sisters is providing for the Littles? The gift of resilience is something that can’t be measured or quantified, just treasured.

Thank you Big Sisters and thank you, Georgie, I still miss the both of you.

Willow (Goddu) Yamauchi, Little Sister from 1979

Princess Books and Barbies

2010-06-01T09:09:00.000-07:00

When My Big Sister Margo and I reminisce about our beginnings as Big and Little Sister, our conversation inevitably turns to the ‘selection criteria’ I had outlined in my Big Sisters application - blond hair, blue eyes and especially long legs! Well, as Margo says, at least she got two out of three!

It was only recently when I was reading a “princess“ book to my daughter (a book I often seem to “lose”, if you know what I mean), awash with waspy waists, button noses and stories entitled "My Perfect Wedding", that I began to muse upon that choice of attributes. Suddenly it came to me – a Barbie doll, I had wanted a real live Barbie doll!! My young self thought that life would certainly be more exciting with the perfect object of femininity driving me around in her pink corvette! Simultaneously, I am struck by other memories from my seven year old psyche. I remember my little blond friend Jocelyn – teacher’s pet and utterly perfect. But then, in a flash, I am also hit with the proudest moment of my seven year old life – picture a corner store in east Van and me in my swarthy splendor stocking up on one cent candies when the Chinese owner in his best broken English tells me that I am so beautiful that one day I could win beauty contests. My chest swelled with pride; could I really be…pretty? One thing was for sure - it was important to be pretty – you became teacher’s pet, won contests and had pink cars. And that was that…I thought. Despite a mother with a heavy feminist penchant, there I was, caught in the trap. A merciless trap of ideals that can never be attained no matter how much plucking, waxing, exercising or make-up is plied on. Just about every woman I know is caught in this trap and suffers from some sort of self-esteem issue. Whether this is an inherently female quality or something created by the media, society or any other number of factors, I am not sure. I was lucky to have my Big Sister Margo, a strong female role model who taught me about the things in life that are important – like being educated, accomplished and kind. The type of person that just knows the gift is in the giving and makes you want to follow suit. I wish I could have shared Margo with a dozen other deserving Little Sisters, but at the same time I feel so lucky to call her my own.

Today I wish I could burn all of the princess books with perfect little females living for the love of their prince, but they are here and something about them draws in little girls. But Big Sisters can make a difference. The volunteer mentors at Big Sisters show young girls that there is so much more to being strong, confident and female than emulating Barbie. This is the type of love and commitment that Margo has shown me…for nearly 30 years!

Ana Tajuelo, former Little Sister from 1984 (pictured above at age 7 in 1984)

Putting the pictures in their place

2010-05-25T09:03:00.000-07:00

Give a kid a few hours a week, and watch her soar. Throughout history, women have faced big challenges. We still do. But today, I think one of our biggest challenges is the way we react to the influences out there. Maybe it’s okay to be fascinated with celebrity, but when did we become so willing to alter our bodies with surgery, so quick to make ourselves sick chasing a number on a scale, or so vulnerable to the wrong crowd? Seems to me, we need something to offset the images, not even to label them bad or good, just put them in their place. I remember the painful, youthful struggle with both body image and self esteem like it was yesterday, and I believe there are ways to strike this critical balance. The influences will always be there. But when you have a strong sense of self, you don’t have to suffer the extremes. I am convinced that’s the difference a positive role model makes. We don’t always get the best grounding from those we look up to. Imagine what you may have been spared or how you may have benefited, if you had a woman to watch make her way in this world with certainty and strength of spirit, who encouraged you in your passion, and just spent a few hours a week with you. Give a girl a few hours a week, and watch her soar. It’s the difference Big Sisters makes. You don’t even have to have any answers. In this complicated life, some things really are so simple.

Written by Tamara Slobogean, Big Sister since 2006

Out with negative media influences, in with summer fun!

2010-05-18T09:32:00.000-07:00

I heard about Big Sisters’ 50th Anniversary Planning Committee from my friend through Facebook last spring. I’m not a Big Sister (yet!) but I have always wanted to be one and I thought this would be a great way to learn about Big Sisters and lend my marketing expertise to the organization at the same time.

One of the goals of the committee was to gather some background information that would help inform a new volunteer recruitment campaign, which was ultimately designed by MacLaren McCann. We decided that we wanted to celebrate this special anniversary by trying to serve more girls than ever before – and do to that we needed to find more volunteer mentors that was ever before! As we dug into the marketing objectives and direction for Big Sisters’ new volunteer campaign I heard, not only some amazing stories first hand, but I was also educated on how important it is for young girls to have a positive mentor in their lives. Without someone to help them find the important, positive things in life, it's hard to keep them from feeling the negative influences from the barrage of media messages that tackle them from every which way they can, every day.

I see girls constantly being exposed to images of model-thin girls, which I imagine makes them feel like they must look much the same way – an alarming trend for most of us to see! I think one of the many ways that a mentor can help young girls is by exposing them to ideas and activities that focus on healthy living, not body image. There are so many activities that can help all of us keep a healthy lifestyle – with positive impacts felt both internally and externally! Here are a few fun, ‘healthy living’ activities that I’ve come up with that matches could enjoy together during our Vancouver spring and summer weather!

1. Go to Granville Island Market and check out the colourful array of fruits, veggies and delicious food!
2. Visit one of the many farmers markets in town.
3. Pick farm fresh berries.
4. Try one of the famous Japadogs! (Not the healthiest, but not the worst! Corner of Smithe and Burrard)
5. Have a picnic in the park.

Written by Karen Parkinson, Big Sisters committee volunteer since 2009

‘Fashionable’ Messages Not Always ‘In Style’ for Young Girls

2010-05-11T10:55:00.000-07:00

I love the new advertising campaign launched by Big Sisters (www.bigsisters.bc.ca/en/Home/Volunteering/VolunteerRecruitment.aspx) especially because I have spent my working life in the fashion business and I know how confusing the messages of advertisers can be. We sometimes think of the fashion industry as being controlled by one central force that sets the direction that everyone else in the business follows, and it just isn’t true. Fashion advertising can be very good but it can also be embarrassing and sometimes it can be bad. This new campaign points out where it can be bad and where it has gone too far, especially for young girls who are so impressionable.

Girls want to grow up to be young women and sometimes they are in a hurry to do it, so they watch everything that young women are doing. Some advertisers take advantage of this and send messages that are meant to titillate so they can sell products. As a sponsor for Big Sisters, my company knows how important it is for young girls to have role models to show them what being a woman is really like. I congratulate Big Sisters for having the courage to challenge advertisers and point out how important it is to have real women as mentors.

Written by Ed des Roches and Katie O’Brien – owners of Plum and supporters of Big Sisters since 1995

Plum is currently raising money for Big Sisters in their stores from May 3-27 www.plum.ca.

Girls Need More Positive Role Models

2010-05-04T09:03:00.000-07:00

“As a young girl growing up, I felt that I could not open up to the one real role model in my life, which was my mother. I had no relationship with my father and no siblings to confide in. Who do you talk to when you don’t have an adult you can trust?”

This was the dilemma Corinne was faced with in her early teens and she found herself turning to ‘celebrity role models’ to look up to. Many of the girls referred to Big Sisters find themselves facing the same dilemma: they don’t have enough – or any – positive role models in their lives. Whether it’s because they’re going through a teenage phase like Corinne was where they don’t want to talk to their parent, or whether it’s due to more challenging life circumstances such as being shuttled between foster homes or dealing with family issues of addiction or abuse, some girls don’t feel they even have one person in their lives who they can look up to.

As a result, we see girls substituting real life mentors with pop culture icons that they idolize. Regardless of whether or not these celebrity role models are positive or negative influences on young girls (and, let’s face it, many are not positive!) they aren’t accessible role models. These pop culture media darlings are not people that young girls can spend time with or ask for advice. Miley Cyrus can’t be at their basketball game cheering them on and Lady Gaga certainly won’t invite them over to bake cookies and have a chat. In order for role models to truly matter in the life of a child, I believe they need to BE there. Children need adult mentors who are, not only positive influences, but who are present in their lives – not simply present on their computer or TV screen.

This was the inspiration for Big Sisters of BC Lower Mainland’s new volunteer recruitment campaign, which is launching this month. The campaign, created pro-bono by MacLaren McCann, targets potential volunteers by giving real world examples of what young girls face every day. Print ads use mock teen magazines (pictured below) to drive home the message. Every headline on the mock magazines was taken from an actual teen magazine cover. Knowing that young girls are confronted with headlines like “Quiz: Are you too easy?” and “It’s okay to go after your friend’s boyfriend!” reinforces that strong, caring role models are more important than ever. The campaign also uses radio ads depicting various ‘celebrity role models’ in action to demonstrate the need for more positive role models for girls. Girls today need more positive role models – and with a current waitlist of over 150 girls, it is our hope that this campaign will inspire more women to volunteer with Big Sisters!

As for Corinne, well, she DID find a positive role model – she found her Big Sister Eva through our program. Today, Corinne is a confident 22 year old who has a healthy relationship with her mom and is studying at BCIT – and she credits her Big Sister Eva with much of her success!

Written by Lisa Cloutier, Big Sisters staff member since 2002.

You can view the ‘Girls need more positive role models’ campaign and hear the radio public service announcements at www.bigsisters.bc.ca/en/Home/Volunteering/VolunteerRecruitment.aspx.

Pleasures from Simple Pastimes

2010-04-27T09:11:00.000-07:00

I find that as I get older I forget many things, but there are memories that stay hidden in my brain, re-appearing when tweaked by something completely unrelated. I’ll be reading something tedious, difficult to get through, my mind wanders off . . . and there it is—Charlotte’s Web. This is a book I read only as an adult, and then only because my Little Sister Tanya and I were paired up by Big Sisters when she was a nine-year-old. Early on I discovered that Tanya hated reading. She couldn’t understand why I'd read a newspaper rather than watch the news on TV. And when she found out that newspapers cost money, while TV was free, she was totally befuddled!

I racked my brain. How could I show her what a pleasure it is to read, how it opens up whole new worlds? My best friend, who had a daughter the same age as Tanya, suggested Charlotte's Web. Tanya rolled her eyes and said that reading was not for girls. So we compromised: I'd read aloud to her three pages and she'd read aloud one page for me; then we'd go to "check the quality" of the ice cream at the Dairy Queen down the street. Although the number of pages read increased, it took a lot of ice creams and pretend voices for the various characters before the story started to tickle Tanya’s interest. I still remember being on a long drive when Tanya suggested that we read the book; she volunteered to read as I drove. She wanted to know how the story ended and read aloud the last 30 pages. Her voice rose and became emotional and tears started flowing when Charlotte died. By this time we were at the side of the road, talking about the good and the sad parts of the book.

Tanya is now over 20 years old, we still keep in touch. And she is reading . . . and reading; the books tend to be romance novels now rather than fables. And she still remembers Charlotte’s Web – we were driving past Templeton street when Tanya thoughtfully mused: “So, Templeton, do you think it was named for the rat in Charlotte’s Web?”

Catherine Aczel Boivie and Tanya were matched as Big and Little Sister from 1996-2007.

National Volunteer Week Reflections & Appreciation

2010-04-20T09:31:00.000-07:00

With this week being National Volunteer Week, I’ve taken some time to reflect back on my experiences with volunteers and as a volunteer. I’ve volunteered doing everything from stuffing envelopes at an environmental organization to working with children and women fleeing domestic violence at a transition house. I’ve worked with volunteers at a community centre, summer camp, youth detox centre, shelter, mental health hospital and, of course, now at Big Sisters.

Big Sisters. Where do I even begin to talk about you – the volunteers of Big Sisters? Over my 4+ years working here, I’ve come across hundreds of you and you wouldn’t believe the things you do! From mentoring, supporting, tutoring and being friends and champions to our Little Sisters, to putting up posters, hosting volunteer fair booths, planning fundraising events, driving people around in golf carts, organizing workshops for our mentors, planting tulips in our backyard, planning match activities, governing our organization, providing us with invaluable expertise, managing 50 Big & Little Sisters in the wilderness at camp, soliciting sponsors for us – the list goes on! We truly could not function without you. And you know what the best thing is? Many of you tell US how you couldn’t imagine your lives without Big Sisters! Well, the feeling is mutual. You’ve become a part of our family, and we’ve become a part of yours. And never have I been so inspired by a group of volunteers like the ones we have at Big Sisters.

I think back to the many of you whom I’ve worked so closely with over the years, and the volunteers who’ve come and gone. Each of you have touched me in a way that I know guarantees that Big Sisters and its volunteers will always have a place in my heart. Our volunteers will always inspire me to believe that – individually and as a group – we can create life change. Whatever it is you do as a volunteer for Big Sisters – whether it is stuffing envelopes or working with a child – I hope you know that you make a significant contribution and you are positively impacting the lives of hundreds of girls every year. So, in the spirit of National Volunteer Week, I’d like to thank each you for what you’ve done for Big Sisters…and what you’ve done for me.

Written by Jordana Zbarsky, Big Sisters employee since 2006

'Notes' from a Study Buddy

2010-04-13T08:44:00.000-07:00

I’ve had the privilege of meeting weekly with Diamond as a Study Buddy for over a year now. I can honestly say it’s one of the most rewarding commitments I’ve ever undertaken. Just a couple of months ago, as we were finishing up some math homework(!) I told Diamond that our time together was almost up for the night. She looked a little crestfallen. Surprised, I asked her if she wanted to do more. She said “Yes, of course. I like spending time with you.” Honestly, we were just doing multiplication and long division. Truth is, I enjoy spending time with her, just as much as she appears to with me. Her boundless enthusiasm for life, her irrepressible youthful attitude, and her wonderful sense of humour make her a joy to spend time with…even if it is dedicated to such “boring” stuff as math and reading. I’d recommend becoming a Study Buddy to anyone. You may not get as lucky as I did (there can only be one “best kid in the world” after all!) but I believe you’ll find you get just as much, if not more, out of the time as you put into it.

Rachel Moffat, Study Buddy tutor since 2008

Serendipity

2010-04-06T09:34:00.000-07:00

When my mother first approached me about having a Big Sister I was twelve years old. My first thought was that it would be disrespectful to my mom and that I was too "mature" and didn’t need extra attention. I agreed to do it anyway. As it turns out, it was the best decision of my life. My Big Sister Joyanne is a vivacious woman who has a great zest for life. The mentorship that she provided me did not end after one year of commitment, but has continued for 27 years. We have done many things together like travelling, going to restaurants and plays, and nature walks, but most important were the talks, support and friendship Joyanne gave me. When my mom died in 1991, Joyanne was right there even though she was due with her second daughter any day. Her kindness and positive words were, and still are, invaluable to me. She is so thoughtful and curious about what’s going on in my life. I appreciate her friendship and consider her one of the chief role models in my life. It was not luck, or design, it was meant to happen the way that it did – it was serendipity.

Trish Quan, former Little Sister (1983-1989)

One Hour Makes a BIG Difference

2010-03-30T08:49:00.000-07:00

Emily and I have been matched together in the Study Buddy program for about a year and a half. Each week I drive across town to the library near her house and we spend an hour working on her schoolwork.

The first time we met together we were both shy and a little unsure of ourselves. We talked about her favorite subjects, her challenges in school and set some goals for her to work towards in improving her English skills. I will never forget at the end of this session, as we were saying good-bye, she hugged me and said “I love you…. so, so much”. I was surprised but also very happy that our first session turned out to be such a hit!

Since then I have looked forward to each of our sessions and we have become good friends. Not only have I seen her grades and confidence improve, I’ve learned a lot about her life, seen her blossom into Canadian life and learned that she has a great sense of humor. We’ve shared a lot of laughs, especially at the end of our sessions when she teaches me a phrase in Mandarin and I attempt to pronounce it.

Many times I’ve wished I could be more than just her Study Buddy, that I could have taken her to an Olympic event or to see Avatar. But the time we’ve spent has been really rewarding, watching her progress and seeing her grades improve in subjects we’ve worked hard on.

And we owe a great thanks to Ivy, our caseworker, who has provided much support and insight. There have been times when I’ve felt discouraged, frustrated if I couldn’t explain certain grammatical rules or felt like I was letting Emily down. But Ivy has provided encouraging words and made me understand even more that I don’t need to have all the answers. I just need to be there with Emily, to listen, to encourage, to help her set goals, and to congratulate her on all of her successes. Thank you, Ivy, and thank you, Emily, for all your hard work!

Written by Penny McCleery, Study Buddy tutor since 2007

Experience of a Little Sister

2010-03-23T09:36:00.000-07:00

Big Sisters of BC Lower Mainland has had a profound impact on my life – not only as a Little Sister, but also as a maturing adult. The support of this organization and the friendship of my Big Sister Eva have meant the world to me. Without Big Sisters and my Big Sister, I can tell you that I would not be where I am today. I would not have had the drive to enroll in university, I would not be able to say that I now have a healthy and loving relationship with my mum, and I would not have developed confidence in myself to push through life’s daily struggles.

As a young girl growing up, I felt that I could not open up to the one real role model in my life, which was my mother. I had no relationship with my father and no siblings to confide in. Who do you talk to when you don’t have an adult you can trust? You talk to your friends, who may not be the best influence or, even worse, you talk to no one! My mum was a single parent who worked hard to pay for all the things that I apparently “needed” in life, as a teen. However, I never acknowledged her helpfulness, instead I was a typical teenager who thought the world revolved around me. Additionally, all of the things that made up positive experiences in my life were often things that I chose to ignore. My mum knew she couldn’t be everything to me and she was concerned that I might start to head down the wrong path. As a result, my mum thought it would be an excellent idea for me to have a Big Sister – someone I could talk to, someone I could rely on to be there, someone I could look up to, and someone we could both trust to be a positive influence on my life.

This has been the best decision my mum has ever made!

Having a Big Sister mentor has made a world of difference in my life. Through the relationship I have built with my Big Sister Eva, I have developed a sense of self worth, self confidence, motivation and a desire to succeed in life. Eva has had an immense impact on my life. With her help and encouragement and the opportunities offered to me through Big Sisters, I received a CIBC Youthvision Scholarship which paid for my tuition at university. I also received the Maxine Sevack Scholarship, which helped pay for my books for one semester.

I have no way of knowing what would have happened in my life if I hadn’t had a Big Sister to be my safety net – but I can assure you that I would not have the self-esteem and positive direction for my life that I do today!

Written by Corinne Grierson, Little Sister since 2003

Why I Love Being a Go Girls Mentor

2010-03-16T09:13:00.000-07:00

I was initially interested in becoming a mentor in the Go Girls! Healthy Bodies, Healthy Minds program because I firmly believe in the value of healthy eating and an active lifestyle. As an athletic young adult who shied away from organized sports as a child and teen, the idea of encouraging girls to become active in their own way was exciting to me.

Over the course of my two terms as a Go Girls mentor however, I have come to appreciate some other, more understated, aspects of this program. Although I continue to love the co-operative games and getting active with the group, I’ve surprised myself by looking forward to our discussions most of all! Together we talk about such topics as the importance of balance in life, how to deal with stressful situations and how to stay mentally and physically healthy during the difficult transition to high school. One of the most important ways that we, as mentors, broach the topics that are most relevant to the girls is through the Go Girls Question Box. At the end of every session, each girl is invited to write down an anonymous question or comment for us to discuss together at the beginning of the following session. This is a perfect way for the girls to get answers to the questions that concern them most – questions that they may not feel comfortable asking parents or teachers. In the past, inquires have ranged from: “How do I get my parents to treat me like an adult?” to, “Am I supposed to like boys?” Some questions are serious, some are silly, and some are downright scary. To address them, my co-mentor and I may use stories from our own middle-school years to help illustrate a point, or we may find ourselves directing the girls to their local health resources, but more often than not, the girls discuss amongst themselves and come up with their own solutions to the problem at hand. In those situations, I am reminded of how smart they all are, and that I too, benefit from our time together!

Written by Thea Gilks, Go Girls mentor since September 2009

Common Ground

2010-03-09T08:50:00.000-08:00

“Ok, I’m a Big Sister! Whew, I made it through the screening and interviews and the match meeting! I guess she thinks I’m alright, eh? And my Little Sister – she seems so awesome. Oh no…..now what? How do I bond with this girl and how do I make a difference in her life?”

These are some thoughts I had as a brand new Big Sister. Don’t get me wrong, the first few weeks of a match are exciting, but definitely a little nerve-wracking too! I’m sure it was for both of us. I had to find a common bond, some staring to point to work off of.

And then we went to a certain coffee shop (you know the ones that dot Vancouver 108 times to be exact?). And a mutual passion for lattes and iced caramel coffees brought us together in a way that I thought very sweet and highly caffeinated drinks never could. We had found our first common bond and we decided to go pretty over the top with it. We made it our goal to visit all 108 Vancouver locations of our favourite coffee shop in the first year of our match. This creates some very high energy and fun filled days which you can probably imagine! So far we are doing quite alright but we have some big plans for the coming months.

Through our adventures in Vancouver we have discovered so much more that we have in common with each other and our relationship as Sisters has grown. You see, all it takes is one little idea, one thread of similarity for a relationship to take flight. My advice to all new matches struggling to find common ground is to break it down to something simple. Make a goal, elaborate on a crazy idea and then just have fun!

Written by Natasha Berntsen, Big Sister since 2009

Note from a Dad

2010-03-02T09:09:00.000-08:00

Learning As We Go - Mentoring is a Two-Way Street

2010-02-23T08:44:00.000-08:00

Over the years and through my experiences, I came to strongly believe that many of the issues that ail us as a society can only be remedied by focusing our help on children and youth who are in their formative years. While we still require all the wonderful programs that help youth deal with their circumstances, we most definitely should focus on helping children grow up with confidence, self worth and the perspective to make good judgments in their lives as they mature. More and more these days, we see evidence that young girls and boys are being introduced to “adult” realities and responsibilities at an increasingly early age. Providing these youth with another role model - or mentor - to develop long-term relationships of trust are key to helping build those essential foundations for highly functioning adulthood and help guide them as they are faced with these responsibilities.

Big Sisters facilitates these relationships and provides outstanding support for both volunteer mentors and Little Sisters. My decision to participate as a mentor developed out of years of desire to help in this capacity. Once I made that decision, I knew I wanted to commit for the long term. Many people asked me how I was going to manage to do it with so many other things on the go including becoming a business owner and a parent. My answer was “just do it”. If you are truly committed and see the value in the program, you will just make it happen.

I expected to meet a wonderful young girl, and I did. I expected to show her all sorts of things she hadn’t had the opportunity to see, and I did. I expected to get some satisfaction out of watching her learn and take in her experiences – I got that in spades. What I didn’t expect was to learn as much as I have about myself and my perspectives, and about others that had never before touched my life until now. This only comes with time and careful reflection on how you have felt or reacted to certain experiences when out together. Some have been teaching moments, particular at the younger age when decisions such as choosing a movie can result in tears of frustration, and some have been absolutely delightful, when you start to realize that your Little Sister is teaching herself to develop personality traits based on your experiences together.

I have learned how to be a better parent by reflecting on what my Little Sister tells me about her thoughts and desires, or her reactions to the adults in her life. I have learned to stop worrying about things that, in the end, are of little consequence to my life. She teaches me to find joy in the simplest things when the rest of our busy world is not yet a reality. She has taught me about deeply personal traits that I see in her, and admire. She has taught me that she absolutely accepts me unconditionally, without prejudice... and that enjoying a cup of hot chocolate is an entirely different experience when you’re 7 than when you’re 12. One day we’re talking about the drama of learning to spell and, before you know it, we’re all of a sudden on to romance, or life and death. My own responses to these very big topics have taught me how I, myself, want to develop as a person from where I am today. I didn’t expect these tremendous life lessons from my experience as a mentor, and they make this journey even more incredible and profound.

For any women who are considering making this contribution in your lives - you’re already part way there. Embrace it, and I can assure you the experience will be fun, rewarding and possibly even life-changing. The results are momentous and important and are helping young girls (and women) become happier and more fulfilled every single day.

My deepest thanks to this organization for the services they provide to all of their participants. May we continue to grow and flourish and learn.

Written by Stephanie Hayes, Big Sister since 2005 and board member since 2009.

Why People Should Become Big Sisters

2010-02-16T09:44:00.000-08:00

Activities: I think people should become Big Sisters because it seems fun. My Big Sister would never have watched "New Moon", gone go-carting, rode the Stanley park choo-choo train, made my Halloween costume, learned the dance "the hoedown throw down", and her iPod wouldn’t have half of the cool tunes that I make her listen to every second Wednesday . But then again if I didn’t have a Big Sister, I wouldn’t have gone down the slides at pools, gone to Camp Jubilee, made chocolate-covered strawberries, had mud fights at the beach, joined the volleyball and basketball teams, gone rock climbing, gone to the April Lavigne concert (soon to be going to the Black Eyed Peas concert), made brownies, and gone to a baseball game, and I wouldn’t get to hear Susan’s BEAUTIFUL voice every time we see each other.

Big Sisters Program!! Big Sisters is such a fun program - these are a couple reasons why. #1 Big Sisters always comes up with the funnest ideas ever like going tubing, going to a 'night club' during the day, going to baseball games and the PNE, movie nights, Camp Jubilee (funnest activity I have ever experienced), sailing to Bowen Island, and a lot of other stuff. Big Sisters did such a good job matching Sue and I together.

Meeting New People: Big Sisters is such a great opportunity! Sue and I got to meet a lot people during this whole experience like Kaylie and Heather, Diane and Alahi, etc.

Funnest Experience - Camp Jubilee: I think Camp Jubilee has been the funnest experience I have had with the Big Sisters program. It is cool to be with your Big Sister for more than a day straight – seeing how they act in the morning, how they eat. The funnest thing that we played was each cabin had to come up with one idea that all the cabins would have to do ex: Run up to your cabin and put on the most clothes you possibly can, dress up one of your cabin members like a celebrity, etc. (It was really hard being the members of the farthest cabin).

Overall it has been a very fun experience all together.

Written by Little Sister Samira, age 11

50th Anniversary Video on Youtube

2010-02-11T10:01:00.000-08:00

Check out this fun, 3 minute video showing some of our Big & Little Sister matches and Study Buddy matches sharing what they LOVE about Big Sisters and wishing us a HAPPY 50th BIRTHDAY!

Big Sisters' Spirit Endures

2010-02-09T09:24:00.000-08:00

Picture a tiny store front office on Main Street and a recruitment meeting at the McDonalds across the road. That was the way it was for those of us who joined Big Sisters a whopping 30 years ago! Lots has changed in the organization since that time, and yet, wonderfully, everything that is really important has not changed at all.

Over the course of these past 30 years I have been matched with two Littles (the second for life!), served on the board, had a stint as president and also sat as chair of the Honourary Advisory Board for over 15 years.

The most obvious changes I have witnessed at Big Sisters are the increase in our matches and staff and, of course, our move to the House. Less obvious, are the developments in our programming, our collaborative relationship with Big Brothers Big Sisters of Canada and our broader public profile. Big Sisters has become Bigger! And, yes, Big Sisters has become Better.

What Big Sisters was doing 30 years ago was ground-breaking. Being well intentioned was not enough. The organization knew that “Bigs” needed support and training and that “Littles” and their families needed consistency and accountability. Successive staffs and boards have worked hard to ensure we set the standard for other Big Sisters/Big Brothers organizations across the country ….and we do. This is a huge achievement for a fledgling organization that was an ‘offshoot’ from the YWCA and started with a budget that wouldn’t keep us in photocopy paper today!

Our first fundraising ‘gala’ was held in a little dance club on Broadway. About 40 of us showed up, drank wine in glow-in-the-dark plastic glasses and raised about $3,500! Now we have sell-out galas of hundreds of people in major venues and raise funds in the six figures. (Hey, but one thing has not changed: our hero, Brad Scott, was our first auctioneer and supported us since his retirement!)

The most important ‘constant’ has been the amazing ‘grassroots’ relationships: ‘Bigs’ and ‘Littles’, staff and board, and board and patrons. And this is what lies at the heart of our organization. Big Sisters and Study Buddies join because they want to support and befriend Little Sisters. Little Sisters and their families come to us because they want and need the care and friendship of a mentor. Board members and patrons donate their resources because they believe in the organization.

My favourite memory is having my Little Sister come over on Friday nights for dinners that we made together. After dinner we would make a ‘nest’ of giant pillows so we could climb in and I could read aloud to her. She had difficulty reading and was thrilled to experience the great books that I was so happy to re-discover with her. When she grew up and had kids of her own she had me over for dinner and proudly pointed to the bookshelf at the top of the stairs….there were all the books we loved so much together.

Written by Linda Parsons, volunteer with Big Sisters since 1980

Making Connections

2010-02-02T09:13:00.000-08:00

Human connection and love are as essential to a fulfilling life as having our basic needs met. Having close attachments with others can actually shape our brain’s development and help us to grow emotionally. At Big Sisters of BC Lower Mainland, for 50 years, we have been helping to build connections between girls and female mentors every week through our programs, and this really needs to be celebrated!
As a counsellor at Big Sisters, it is a privilege and an honour to support so many caring volunteers and Little Sisters. I am humbled by the generosity, warmth and energy that each person in a match has for one another. Despite all of the time we take in getting to know each volunteer and Little Sister, there is always a little bit of a leap of faith and hope when we make a match. There are so many unknowns and questions in the beginning. Will they connect? Will they let down their walls to let the other in? Will they be patient as time together and trust begin to forge this relationship?
Yet something is clearly working here as we continue to create the space for women and girls to bond as sisters and friends. And a friendship takes time to grow; it takes consistency and patience. The other day, I likened the Big and Little Sister relationship to the theory of the stock market… You take a risk and, over time, the connection increases and you begin to see the benefits, but you need to anticipate that there will be ups and downs along the way. The return, though, is something money can not buy. The return is making an imprint on someone’s life; as each contribution slowly builds esteem, well-being and ultimately, a sense of belonging and peace. Connection and love make a difference in all of our lives. Thank you to everyone involved at Big Sisters for recognizing how important this is!

Written by: Erin Henderson, Big Sisters Program Counsellor since 2007

Everything I Needed To Know I Learned From My Study Buddy

2010-01-26T09:52:00.000-08:00

“Most of what I really need to know about how to live, and what to do, and how to be, I learned in kindergarten. Wisdom was not at the top the graduate school mountain, but there in the sand box at nursery school.” ~ Robert Fulghum

But sometimes in our lives, things get tough and we forget what’s really important to us. Luckily for me, that’s when I met Tianna. I was working far too many hours at a corporate job and trying to find my way in the world of work.

When we met she was a shy nine year old and has evolved into an inspiring thirteen year old who reminds me every day what is really important in life. I decided to volunteer as a Study Buddy as a way to give back to the community, but I believe I have gained just as much from our partnership as she has.

We meet once a week to work on her homework but we both get so much more than that. We get laughter and friendship and leave our sessions ready to face whatever challenges lie ahead, be it in school or in life.

Tianna has blossomed into a brilliant young woman who is thriving in her first year of high school and I could not be more proud of her. I look forward to the next four years where I will continue to work with Tianna and assist her in becoming the first person in her family to graduate from high school.

Written by Meghan Schroeder, Study Buddy tutor since 2005

"The Lifers"

2010-01-19T10:44:00.000-08:00

Friends since 1984, Margo and I are one of the longer Big and Little Sister matches in the Lower Mainland. As she says, “We’re lifers.” Back in the early 1980’s, my mom had the bright idea to sign me up for a Big Sister. I was demanding, overly opinionated, had not weathered the divorce of my parents well, and was insanely jealous of my utterly too cute younger sister. My mom, a single parent, needed a break – and, frankly, I probably did too. Enter Margo – the Big Sister who changed my life. Margo spent the calm, one-on-one time with me that I so desperately needed. She chatted and loved, joked and nurtured her way into the hearts of all of my family members. Through her lessons and, more importantly, her example, she taught me a lot about the type of person I wanted to be. Most importantly, she had the tenacity to be a constant in an ever changing world. I moved every year between my divorced parents – Saltspring, Vancouver, Montreal and, eight schools later, Margo managed to keep up. She inspires me still with her own business, a published book and dreams that never end. Being a Big Sister was not a commitment she took on lightly and 20 some years later when my mom was dying she called on Margo very seriously to take the role of grandmother to my daughter when the time came. That time came and, although we are far apart with me in Montreal and Margo still in Vancouver, I dream of the day when I can ship my daughter (who’s two and, yes, very terrible!) off to Margo’s for the summer to learn to be the confident, well-spoken kind-hearted person that Margo has taught me to be.

Ana Tajuelo, former Little Sister, 1984

A Mini Me

2010-01-15T13:12:00.000-08:00

Being a Big Sister is fantastic and SO rewarding. I get along very well with my Little and the Big Sisters organization was great at matching us - She is a ‘mini me’, can you believe it! I have a new friend in my life and feel like I make a difference in her life. I enjoy spending time with her doing many activities that she has never done before. I show her new things, laugh, play and chat. She is my buddy.

Written by Big Sister Julie Pellicelli, Big Sister since 2009

The Magic of a Match

2010-01-12T13:32:00.000-08:00

It’s called volunteering. I’d call being a Big Sister one of the most powerful experiences I’ve ever had. It begins with the magic of the match. I would never have imagined I could have so much in common with a nine year old. Four years later, I marvel I can find such common ground with a 13 year old. From a shared interest in food and baking and cooking and health, to a mutual interest in art, fashion, swimming and sport in general. Had we both been the same age and at the same school, Heather and I would probably have found one another on our own. The care and attention taken with making each match is a testament to the work the Big Sisters counsellors do every day. And it doesn’t stop there. Any hesitation or concern I had, (or may still have), about my own capabilities as a mentor – any worries about whether I have what it takes to support, encourage and just be able to have fun in a really positive, empowering way, quickly melt away thanks to the rock our counsellor Pisa has been. Being a mentor comes with a responsibility I take seriously. But what has surprised me is how much this experience teaches me about myself too. Here’s one of the most profound nuggets I have gleaned so far: you don’t have to be able to teach science, or unlock the mysteries of math, or reveal all or any of life’s secrets. All you really have to do is show up and hang out one on one for a few hours a week. Sometimes it’s like you’re adding water to a wilted flower. And sometimes, surprisingly, it’s you who is revived.

Written by Tamara Slobogean, Big Sister since 2006

A ‘Little’ Thank You from Lula

2010-01-07T15:01:00.000-08:00

Hey there, my name is Lula and my Big Sister’s name is Erin. I know it hasn't been as long as some other matches, but we've been matched up for just over a year now – our one year anniversary was on September 9th. Since we met, we've learned so much about each other. It's cool her cat has the same name as me and we’ve and done so much. Erin says, "Since the time we've spent together I can just tell you've grown up so much." And I have. Erin being in my life has helped me out a lot. I've gone through some rough patches and she always knows how to help me out of them. If it's with school, no problem, I can go to her. If it's something wrong at home, no problem, I can go to her. Even when it comes to boys and relationships, again, I can always go to her. I bet I can't even count all the boys she knows about:)

Being my age I love doing a lot of stuff, but when it comes to something I'm really not interested in, I get bored fast. Erin always finds a way to keep me interested and I almost never have to tell her that I don't want to do something because I don't like it – she always picks the best activities, like going places I've never been before. Last year, Big Sisters planned an outing for matches at Mt. Seymour for snow shoeing and snow tubing and it just happened to be on the day of my birthday! It was awesome. Going to Whitecliff Park was an experience and a half – it's so beautiful there. And Erin took me to my first time going to the aquarium. We've even gone to her parents’ house for Christmas dinner twice now, and they still love me:)

Sure, me and Erin have had a couple downs, but even when it's down there's never an up too far away and the downs never last long anyway. I wanted to take some time to write this because Erin has played the perfect role in my heart and she will forever be there and that wouldn't have happened if Big Sisters wasn't so good at what they do. So I wanted to say, Thank You and Happy 50th Anniversary – you guys are awesome!

Written by Little Sister Lula, age 15

Happy 50th Birthday Big Sisters!

2010-01-05T09:19:00.000-08:00

It’s a big year for Big Sisters of BC Lower Mainland! 2010 marks the 50th anniversary of our agency – 50 years of friendships, 50 years of mentoring, 50 years of providing young girls in the Lower Mainland with positive role models. What started in the late 1950’s with a group of caring women simply deciding to provide their time and friendship to some girls in need at a Vancouver school, has grown into Big Sisters of BC Lower Mainland as you know it today. And although lots has changed since that time – we became a registered non-profit organization in 1960, we have employed staff, a beautiful house that functions as our office, three growing programs, and hundreds of volunteers annually – the foundation of what we do has not changed from the vision those women in the 50’s had. Every day, our volunteers and staff seek to provide vulnerable girls with the support and friendship of a positive role model. As we have witnessed throughout the past 50 years, a girl who has at least one person in her life who supports her and believes in her can start to believe in herself. And, as you know, when you believe in yourself…suddenly so much is possible.

Since 1960 there have been literally thousands of volunteers, Little Sisters, families, staff, and community partners who have been a part of our organization and helped us build these special connections between young girls and volunteer mentors. As we talked about how we could celebrate such a wonderful milestone – 50 years! – it became clear that we should celebrate, not with a traditional anniversary party, but in a way that furthered our mission and celebrated mentoring. So, throughout this year we will celebrate our 50th anniversary by sharing stories of the past, present and future of our organization with our past, present, and future volunteers and supporters!

We are an organization of stories. Everyone who has been touched by Big Sisters or by mentoring has a story. This blog will share those stories throughout 2010. And we encourage you to be a part of this blog – read the blog posts, comment on others’ stories and share your thoughts, or write your own story. Share your story on our blog by sending it to us at lcloutier@bigsisters.bc.ca. I look forward to a year of stories of our past 50 years, and many, many more years of stories to come!

(Plus - check out all of our anniversary plans on our website!)

Written by: Lisa Cloutier, Director of Operations, Big Sisters of BC Lower Mainland